Souls Of Mischief

life as a law student can have the mysterious ability to reduce the fun factor in many a student's life. if it's not painfully studying for an exam or hacking through another legal memo, then it's engaging in some sort of political issue debate with someone else that is never going to admit you're right, because after all that is what law school is about.

unfortunately daily shenanagans seem to be a thing of the past, so when the opportunity arrises, it becomes extra fun. last week, after my roommate and i finished our last class at the university of western cape, we took it upon ourselves to get into some good ol fashion mischief. we had some of the students take us on a tour of the campus, which we quickly started to realize seemed to be quite segragated. anyways, we were taken to the "indian" part of the campus, only to our surprise the indian part was segragated as well. it seems that over the years, the students have staked out their own territories on campus and cleverly named it bombay, kashmir, and get this, the neutral u.n. territory. and what seemed like a joke to us at first, was really true and that the people in their territories do not get a long and do not hang out socially. so of course, me and my roommate saw this as a perfect opportunity to cause some mischief, so we decided to we do interviews with some of the students and conduct surveys with them. after approached a group of girls and asking them if they belonged to bombay or kashmir, they quickly interjected and said they would never be a part of bombay, and told us to just look at the way that they dressed. when we looked over, it appeared to us as outsiders that they on the bombay side were dressed exactly like these girls, but when we mentioned that to our focus group, they clearly were not impressed. anyways, the rest of the story, is once again filled with you have to be there type of moments, but let's just say that me and my roommate did our best to start peace talks with the neighbouring areas, but came up empty, but we did have a blast doing it.

which brings me back to toronto, where mischief has reigned supreme for an entire week. i'm not going to go into details, because after all i am a "law student." but a sample of mischief in the low end has been as simple as going into the apple store in eaton centre and finding the only rap song, wycelf - party to damascus, and playing it on every ipod stereo system they have on full blast to "test it", and having the security following us around so he can turn it down. seeing his annoyed face after the tenth time, outstanding. as for mischief on the highend, well i've got to run, but let's just say, twins, tattoos, and gold wrapped chocolate coins.

safety

Jo'Burg/Cape Town State Of Mind

coming back to toronto after 2 months in south africa has once again been an adjustment. first of all driving home, i've forgotten how it's like to not have to enter a gate, surrounded by a perimeter wall, topped off with electric fencing. i guess i'm still in that south african state of mind, because today i was sitting at home with my mom and like normal she leaves the front door open, and i couldn't help it but to close it and lock it up. i noticed that the car was parked in the driveway as usual with the windows down, which is unheard of in south africa, and while i was about to roll them back up, i realized there was absolutely nothing that could be stolen (see old school whip below) , i'd even welcome it, if someone tried to jack my broken tape dock.

also coming back to toronto means no more jags, mercs or bm's to roll in, but the old school 94 sunbird joint with the 12 black fake bbs, with the tape deck on full blast. but it's not even that, it's getting used to driving on the other side of the rode. i got so used to the right handed side drive, that when i got back here and the first time i was in the car, i had to actually think about which side to drive on. then not having to deal with crazy south african taxis, or people on the street selling stuff like coat hangers, dvd's, cell phone accessories, soccer balls, fruit, world maps, mirrors can be a little disorientating to say the least. plus not having to pay parking guards, for not breaking into your car. also being back in toronto, i almost forgot that you can't under any circumstances run red lights, which in south africa at night is the norm. if i could count on one hand the number of times i was told that the area we were in was a high highjack area, i would need about 8 hands. but here blazing down the street at 200km's then telling the cops that i thought i was being followed by hijackers, would not fly. these are just a few things that the streets of toronto and just about everywhere else in the world are missing

safety

I Got A Story To Tell Part I

"this is africa jack"
the tag line of the whole trip. and an unforgetable moment if there ever was one. as i mentioned before, one of the coolest most laid back guys in the program, lets call him flordia, just totally lost it on his roommate, oklahoma, but you had to hear the guy tell the story to really appreciate it. a quick version goes like this. now i guess it's not uncommon for people in close quarters not to get along when personalities clash (as extremely evident by some of the girls in the program). we were randomly assigned roommates, and most of us shared rooms. well one night a bunch of people went out, and as expected we got back late. when florida went back to his room, oklahoma must have been sleeping, but anyway the rooms have really massive doors, so it's virtually impossible to close them without making some sort of a noise, but not even a big noise. anyway, florida was as quiet and respectful as he could be. well the next morning at 6 am, florida is awakened by the sounds of christian rock blaring from a lap top by none other than oklahoma. when florida ask what he is doing if can turn it down. oklahoma responded, something along the lines of: "well, last night when you came in, you were banging doors, being all inconsiderate, so it's only right that i be inconsiderate now" now most people in the program were not big fans of oklahoma already, because lets say he can say things that could be considered offensive, and when you're situated in a country such as south africa, with a history as it is, that's probably not a great idea. anyways, florida, clearly upset from all that was going on, decided to just blow it off, and go back to sleep. that is, until he just recollected what had just happened. so in his words, after about 5 minutes of thinking it over, florida jumped out of his bed, went into the main room where oklahoma had gone and proceeded to let it all out, and somewhere what was being said, florida ripped off his shirt hulk hogan style, and let oklahoma know: "if you got a problem, this is africa jack, we can settle it right here"

"that's a cold deal"
table mountain is some 3000 feet high and about 3 km wide. most people go up table mountain on a nice day using the cable car which takes around 20 minutes to see the spectacular view. of course a couple students decided they would do the 3 plus hour (for fit people) hike up the mountain. sure, they were sucessful, but what they didn't realize is that cable cars stop operating around 6pm when it gets dark, and the workers and staff that are up there, take the last cable car back. so by the time these students got to the top, everything was closed and it was getting dark fast. hiking back down the moutain at this time was not an option, one of the students hurt their ankle. cell phones don't work at top, so calling emergency was out of the question. the only solution, one of the students had to hike down the mountain as much as she could, until she could get reception and call for help to get the others down. all this, on the day before our constitutional exam. after hearing about this, me discussing this with my roommate.
me: "hey did you hear about those girls who got stuck on top of cable mountain?"
roommate: "yeah, that's a cold deal"

"would you let me finish, you might learn something"
i've met many characters in my life, but none can compare to the man known as supurb. picture an older cat, already a lawyer, in ny no less, coming as an alumni on a trip with a bunch of mid-twenty year olds, in cape town, surrounded by beautiful women, then compare that to the greaziest person you know, then times that by 10, and that is approximately how supurb is. now supurb is not a bad guy, i actually got a long with him extremely well, but the sh-t talk that can come out of this man's mouth is priceless. and the thing is, it's not like that he doesn't say interesting stuff, but it's like having to use a filter to get through all the nonsense and extra junk before getting to it. supurb to a liking to room 302, because he said we were on his level, what level he meant i have clue. most evenings after class, he would come up to our room uninvited most times, and make himself at home. we would kick it out on the balcony and start talking about whatever, and this is where it would begin. now most times, i would sit back and laugh myself silly, but my roommate he would constantly question some of the things supurb would say, bad move. but not only does supurb talk a lot, he talks loud, like loud as in the neighbours from across the canal complain. and anytime we would ask him to tone it down, just a little bit, before we could even finish, supurb would interupt us by saying: "would you let me finish, you might learn something" classic.

"man that's hateful"
imagine a situation, where your options are as follows: you have just found out that you have been kicked out of your room, and you are now left with a situation where you can either stay in the apartment of people you like and sleep on the couch, or you can room with someone you hate, and would probably argue with everyday. you'd probably select the first option right. not supurb, in his own words, it went something life this.
supurb: "you think i'm going to let that motherf--ker get a room to himself, f--k that!
302: "but supurb, if you stay on the couch, you could still be cool, and yeah so what he'd be good, but if you both stay in the same room, you know you can't stand him..."
supurb: "nah man, i'd rather f--k things up for the both of us, it's the principle behind it"
302: "man that's hateful"

"you lack composure"
a friend of mine from cape town was out for a night on the cape town with lady friend of his, doing it big as many south african's do. when it came time to going home, it's not uncommon for south africans to blaze down the streets in an effort to get home as fast as you can. but on this occasion, the young man, was pulled over by the south african fuzz a few blocks away from his house. the girl, already histerical from the fast driving, urged my friend to be cool. but when the cops approached the car, my overconfident friend proceeded to tell the cops to "f--k off" asking why the pulled him over. the police than asked him to get out of the car, and asked him to hop around on one leg suspecting that maybe he had something to drink. my friend, an excitable young man, started hopping around, and started gaining in confidence, and started hopping in a straight line, just to show he could do it, and continued to yell at the police. the girl in the car by this time, had totally lost it, and by then all you could hear was "what's wrong with you, you lack composure." the cops sensing that this girl was about to lose it, than actually felt sorry for the guy, told him to get back in the car, and drive home safetly right away.

"son, your only job is to call heads or tails"
i went to go watch some of my south african friends play a league soccer game at mitchell's plain in cape town as i mentioned sometime back. when it comes to playing soccer in mitchell's plain, the level of skill is quite high, but so can the level of physical play. on this occasion "mr. referee" was not interested in anything anyone had to say. because here, players were being fly kicked, and he would not even pull out a yellow card, but when one of my friend's teammates swore at the referee for not making a call, "mr. referee" proceeded to give him a red card. my friend, the captain for the game, then went up to the referee and was like:
captain: "mr referee, as captain can i speak to you for a moment"
mr. referee: "son, your only job is to call heads or tails, your job is done"
captain: 'but, they're fly kicking us..."
mr. referee: "i said your job is done...yellow card"

The Documentary

Welcome to South Africa
Table Mountain from the Waterfront
Otherside of the Mountains, when someone says they live in a house on the hills, it ain't no joke.
One of many beaches, note that this is the winter time
Penguins in South Africa, it's true
Where the Indian and Atlantic Ocean meet. If you look closely you can actually see the line in the water where they meet. It's true.
Devil's Peak from our ship in Hout Bay.
Up the mountains for sunset
The mean streets of Cape Town
Room 302 is in the building. Student living in Cape Town
Where the magic happens
Our balcony.
The view from our place
I almost forgot, we did have classes to attend to. Justice Zak Yacooub, our comparitive constitutional law teacher.

Not everything is all good in South Africa. Shacks in a township. About 20 minutes from where we stayed, it looks like this
These are some of the nicer houses in a township
Lady selling crafts in the township
South African police. Definately not the safest place in the world.
How most people protect themselves. Note the electric fencing and steel gate to get into the house.
Signs from the Apartheid Days.
Park Benches from the Apartheid Days

See Me In Your City Sittin Pretty Know I'm Shinin Dog

back "home" in toronto after a long flight from my "home" in south africa (where i sat on the same plane as manchester united from jo'burg to london). i decided i needed a holiday from my vacation so my return to minneapolis has been delayed. lots to do in the mean streets of tdot.

but for now i have tonnes of celebrity gossip i need to catch up on. did you know that paris hilton hacked into lindsay lohan's blackberry, that never made the news in south africa.

Award Tour

like tribe i'm about to begin my award tour. over the next 48 hours i'll have gone from cape town, to johannesburg, to london to toronto to minneapolis (guess which one doesn't belong). so if everything goes according to plan (which i prefer it not too), i should be back on the grind in m-town on monday night.

holla at your boy

I'm Leaving On An Aeroplane And I Don't Know When I'll Be Back Again

it's a wrap on the 2006 howard law school summer program in south africa and cape town definately let us know it was going to miss us because it rained today like it has no other day since we been here. it's like the world knew we were leaving and it cried for us (i can't remember what the name of the literary device is used to describe that, but i remember learning it when we studied shakespeare, oh well). to say it was a good time would be an understatement, especially for room 302. although at times classes did get in the way of our vacation here, we couldn't even complain about that because it was actually interesting (ie. easy). lots of great memories, lots of great people, and a great setting, i don't think you could ask for anything more. though i do wonder how much fun did everyone who stayed in minneapolis for the summer have, i'm surrrrrre they had an even better time...we could compare pictures, really.

falconier 302 out. sk out.

Heard 'Em Say

my brother says the best thing about south africa is that the slang never changes. although this mihgt be true, the south african way of words is classical. some examples.

if someone tells a story about their past and refers to "being on holiday", and this "holiday" was fpr a period longer than what you would consider a holiday, say like 5 years, this really means they were in prison.

to give someone a good hiding is to give someone a hellava beating.

my bru - my brother, but used after nearly every sentence in cape town, by a capetonian when talking to another capetonian. for example:
capetonian #1: howzit my bru? did you watch the the france-italy game?
capetonian #2: yah my bru. did you see zidane slanag the owen my bru?
capetonian #1: yas sis my bru, the owen deserved it my bru

vie to the garage is to go to the gas station.

slaang the oak/owen is to knock/beat the guy

yas sis - is like saying oh wow, oh really

do you smaack her? - do you like her

cherry - girl (i remember this one from when i was 8)

quai - cool (i also remember this one from when i was 8)

yoh - wow
lekker - great. everything can be lekker. you have to be here, to realize how many ways it could be used though.

something is hectic - south africans love to say this, but it could be good or bad. for example, that constitutional law exam was hectic (bad), or, did you see the kanye west concert in jo
burg, it was hectic.

This Is How We Do

true south african stories

a friend of my uncle was looking for a cheap exterminator to kill ants in his house. so after looking for a period of time, he saw a place in the phone book called really cheap exterminators. he called the place up and they said they would send someone the next day. the next day, a guy came with a newspaper and asked where the ants where. he then started swatting all the ants he could he in about an hour. he then wrote up a bill, and charged for the price of the newspaper, and 1 hour of labour, total cost 15 rand (about $2.50 us). only in south africa

i was set to play golf with my uncle in cape town. we arrived at the greens and just before we started, my uncle pulled out the scorecard, and filled out all the holes with scores he "believed" he was going to get (of course he gave himself par or nearly par for every hole). he said it's much easier because then we don't have to waste time counting how many shots we hit, and we can just play. after the game was played, and although he clearly hit nearly double what he wrote on his scorecard, when anyone asked how he played, he showed them the scorecard and acted like he really hit that well. only in south africa.

a friend of mine wanted to make sure i saw the real south africa, since i had been spending so much time at the waterfront in cape town, which is home to many-a-baller. so went to mitchell's plain for a game of soccer, an area that makes compton look like boardwalk. unfortunately i'll have no pictures of this to share, because i was warned before hand that what you take with out, may not be coming back with you, if you know what i mean. still it was such a great game, that i went back the following week, and as indicated by my typing here, i'm still on the move.

holla

Diamonds From South Africa

chalk it up to being a little delayed as my south african friends like to say, but i just realized i never fully explained what i've been doing in south africa all this time. certainly being south african helps. but what i may have failed to mention, is that this time i'm here as part of the howard law school summer program in south africa. i guess it's similar to what university of minnesota law school set up in china this year, but this program has been running for 10 years, and is total first class all the way.

there are about 60 students from different law schools across the states and about 30 south african law students from the university of western cape law school. as part of the program in cape town (which i say is the finest city in the world and i dont think any of the other students here will disagree), they put us in 5 star apartments in the waterfront marina for the 6 week program. when i'm talking luxuary apartments, i'm talking about million dollar apartments, right on cape town's waterfront, prime location, so we're balling like jay-z right now. we get maid service everyday, fresh towels, dishes washed you name it. i'm fortunate enough that i have two cool room-mates, and we all get along real well, and how could you not being in cape town in these kind of conditions. room 302 is definately in the building. but true to fact, some of the other students have not faired so well in their living conditions (what is it about girls not getting along together). there are some truly outstanding stories in there, but they are of those you have to be there kind of moments. but picture one highlight where there was this one guy, probably one of the coolest most calm seeming person you met, going ballistic on his revren like roommate, ripping off his shirt and screaming "this is africa jack". needless to say, these two do not talk to each other anymore. and then there is this old school cat, let's call him superb, and let's just say he is a habitual line stepper, as charlie murphy would say.

anyways, as part of the program, a bus picks us up from our apartments every morning at 730 to take us to campus. and when i say 730 i mean like 7:29:59 because time waits for no one here. when they say they leave on time, they leave on time, and people get left behind all the time, and we can only afford to miss 2 classes. it's been pretty classical, because some of the other american students thought they could stroll in a few minutes late and that the bus would not leave without them. wrong! on more than one occasion, they've had to run down the street, chasing the bus. classes usually end at 1 if there are no additional tours, or trips to the court or parliament. then some students go for internships at some of the law firms in the city, while others go back to the waterfront and kick it, and i mean kick it.

then as i mentioned some time ago, we are doing a comparitive constitutional law class, taught by one of the supreme court justices, who just happens to be blind and deaf. there is also an international business transaction class, and finanly an international human rights class (which i elected not to take, because of what i call strategic reasons, again something you would understand if you were here). but anyways, classes here have been great, and being here, i realized that there is something clearly missing from our class discussions back at the u. part of it, might have to do with having students from south africa and from several different schools, but it's even more simple than that, and again if you were here, you would know exactly what i'm talking about. but the only thing i will say, is that we are definately missing out.

there have been so many other highlights in there. on july 4th, some of the students organized a huge july 4th celebration, and had a braii (bbq) and invited all the south african students as well, total class. parties have been great. tours have been outstanding. some of the students went shark diving (with real sharks), you better ask about it. i don't know how other summer programs may be, but if you want to really enjoy yourself, and see and do stuff that you have never done before, then i recommend the howard law school summer program. and for me, knowing people here, makes it all that, and a big bag of chips with the dip. mrcanadian holding it down. best time ever. coming back to minneapolis, is going to be like getting dropped from your record label and having to move back to the hood after this.

holla.

Touch The Sky

mr. college dropout himself kanye west arrived in johannesburg on tuesday, and guess who got to see him live in concert. mr. west puts on a hectic show, and he even brought an orchestra to play the music to all his songs, making it probably the best live show i ever seen. south africa has once again been way too kind to me. if you don't see me back in september, you know where to find me. you can just call me the law school dropout. holla.

Out In The Streets They Call It Murder, Welcome To Jo'Burg

back in johannesburg. still alive and well...